I still remember the struggle of being in high school. The mounting weight of uncertainty, ever-changing friend groups, and an insatiable desire to be accepted—man, what a great time that was! In all seriousness, I did enjoy high school; however, the reality is that it is a season when you begin to form your identity and brave the bigger questions in life. Who am I? What is my purpose? What do I want in life? Just to name a few.
Among these new questions and insecurities that arise during those formative years, I think there is one that is shared amongst us all. At least, I’ve never met anyone who has denied this desire.
It’s the desire—the yearning—to be fully known and fully loved. We want to be able to sit across from someone with all of our thoughts, emotions, everything that makes us, us out on the table and for them to see us as no one else gets to, and look us right in the eyes and say, “I love you still.”
In other words, we want intimacy. The American Psychological Association defines intimacy as, “An interpersonal state of extreme emotional closeness such that each party’s personal space can be entered by any of the other parties without causing discomfort to that person. Intimacy characterizes close, familiar, and usually affectionate or loving personal relationships and requires the parties to have a detailed knowledge or deep understanding of each other.”
Among these new questions and insecurities that arise during those formative years, I think there is one that is shared amongst us all. At least, I’ve never met anyone who has denied this desire.
It’s the desire—the yearning—to be fully known and fully loved. We want to be able to sit across from someone with all of our thoughts, emotions, everything that makes us, us out on the table and for them to see us as no one else gets to, and look us right in the eyes and say, “I love you still.”
In other words, we want intimacy. The American Psychological Association defines intimacy as, “An interpersonal state of extreme emotional closeness such that each party’s personal space can be entered by any of the other parties without causing discomfort to that person. Intimacy characterizes close, familiar, and usually affectionate or loving personal relationships and requires the parties to have a detailed knowledge or deep understanding of each other.”
The intimacy we long for can only be found in the person of Jesus Christ.
We desire intimacy because we were created in the image of the eternally intimate triune God. God, in eternity past and eternity future, has and always will exist in the most intimate community there is: The Father, The Son, and The Spirit.
What we all need to recognize is that the intimacy we long for can only be found in the person of Jesus Christ. There is no more intimate act than Christ’s death for us. He knew everything about us, all of our sins and shame, and yet, He still laid down His life for us. He fully knows you and fully loves you.
God designed us with this in mind, and we were created to experience this same intimacy, this same oneness. Primarily with Himself, but also with one another, and there is no more intimate relationship among God’s people than marriage. God created the institution of marriage to foster an intimate relationship between one man and one woman so we could have a tangible expression of our intimate relationship with Him.
If you want to experience that kind of intimacy in a palpable way, then follow God’s design for marriage. He created us to experience intimacy, and if we follow His ways, we will get the immense privilege of a brush with the intimacy we crave.
What we all need to recognize is that the intimacy we long for can only be found in the person of Jesus Christ. There is no more intimate act than Christ’s death for us. He knew everything about us, all of our sins and shame, and yet, He still laid down His life for us. He fully knows you and fully loves you.
God designed us with this in mind, and we were created to experience this same intimacy, this same oneness. Primarily with Himself, but also with one another, and there is no more intimate relationship among God’s people than marriage. God created the institution of marriage to foster an intimate relationship between one man and one woman so we could have a tangible expression of our intimate relationship with Him.
If you want to experience that kind of intimacy in a palpable way, then follow God’s design for marriage. He created us to experience intimacy, and if we follow His ways, we will get the immense privilege of a brush with the intimacy we crave.
I pray that [God the Father] may grant you, according to the riches of his glory, to be strengthened with power in your inner being through his Spirit, and that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. I pray that you, being rooted and firmly established in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the length and width, height and depth of God’s love, and to know Christ’s love that surpasses knowledge, so that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.
– Ephesians 3:16-19
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